“NOT NOW” DOESN’T ALWAYS MEAN “NO”
By Judith Parker Harris | January 30, 2010
Block: No
Buster: Be patient, persistent and polite
I am currently helping my husband find an agent for his incredible memoir, BLOB DADDY. One came highly recommended to me by a dear friend and colleague, but she, like everyone else is B-U-S-Y.
Because we came highly recommended, the agent took my first call immediately. She also read my first email with alacrity and agreed, enthusiastically to read the manuscript. It was then that communication dried up. I emailed, to know avail. I called to no avail, but I then did something I normally would not do. I remained patient.
You see, patience is not my strong suit, although I do feel it is one of my main lessons I am supposed to learn in this life. Perhaps because this contact is for my husband and not myself, and because he is so confident in himself and everything he does, I decided to wait patiently (and confidently).
I then did the second thing I would not normally do. I followed up persistently. Not a nuisance, mind you, I emailed short, pithy and humorous little reminders every couple of weeks. After a month passed, I called and left a short, pithy and humorous phone message. When no answer came, I called again in two days and she answered the phone.
I then surprised myself with my third change in character. I dropped any hint of “an attitude,” and went directly to sympathetic and empathetic, saying, “I’m so sorry to bother you, I know how busy you must be, but my husband just turned 91 and we really want to get this memoir published while he can still sign books, and we’d love to work with you.” She laughed in disbelief and promised to read it enthusiastically. Then she said something that shocked me. She said, you have just displayed the three key elements that must be present for me to want to work with someone, “patience, persistence and politeness.”
I was shocked, as I had just dedicated myself to all three qualities while trying to forge a relationship with her.
I have got to believe that we are a match made in publishing heaven, and to that end I will remain, patient, persistent and polite.
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