This is Part 12 of a continuing series by Cindy Baker Gilbert

It was pointed out I am too old to be daddy’s little girl. Also, daddy was crazy which is a problem and explains why I worked for so many crazy daddies throughout the years. Some so genius that to effectively work for them meant to stay out of their way and quietly get the job done. Shut up and show up was fine since free rides home in the very G4 I booked for business trips was part of the deal and birthdays meant Gucci bags from one of the wives.

But to set out on my own, to bring to fruition all my dreams of writing and art without a crazy daddy in the picture to suck up all my energy and time is a freeing yet daunting task. If I’m not waiting for direction or even a job from a crazy daddy (bye bye Sorceress villain), then why do I have so many doubts and not doubts of which I am aware exactly? More a nagging voice that says what’s the use, who wants to read this, I can’t be the first person to think of this. That stuff. With the Sorceress villain disappearing and me knowing it’s up to me, who pops up next but the Killer Villain causing me to doubt my ideas and dreams and trapping me in my past cut off from my own heart power and belief in myself.

But to conquer a villain is to push past my comfort zone which I have done. And no, my grand idea from last month did not pan out, but I am not deterred. Instead, I expanded on that idea to include all equine facilities in Sothern California and not just the one in Malibu. (Take that Killer Villain. Cindy’s not giving up.)

I queried ten horse ranches and told them of my administrative and managerial experience at the multi-million dollar equine facility that is now up for sale and inquired if there was a position open at their facility.

I also let them know my BFA in dramatic writing from NYU and my MFA in screenwriting from UCLA meant I knew how to tell a story and certainly their establishment had its own unique story, a story that told on their website would be a great way to market their services.

That’s what I did today. Tomorrow I will come up with another idea. And another and another because I am determined to figure out and eliminate all that has held me back and kept me under a rock so that my light can’t shine.

JPH Comment: Watch out Killer Villain, Cindy got her groove (spirit) back. She’s escaped the past and what didn’t work out to focus on the present – determined to find the idea that will work!

Categories : Blocks in the News

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